When You Are Gone

by Yasmin binti Ahmad

But if only God would grant me a piece of His courage,
I might face your absence without dying. 
But if only you would take me with you wherever you go,
I would find home in a million different places.
And I would sweeten you in a million different ways.
Before you are sleepy, I will have already placed a thigh under your falling head.
Before you are hungry,  I am already peeling onions.
When you are angry with me, I shall kiss you.
When you are not, I shall kiss  you twice.
If you should die before me, I shall lie down beside you.
Whisper a joke into your half-listening ear.
Promise the ultimate promise of eternal companionship.
When you are gone, I do not die, 
But I am forever dying. 

If there's a place I can call my own.
a place where the music of all favourites songs play night long as the eyes closes,
a space where paint bursting balloons bursting yet the floor are considered clean with the magical glow.

a place where paint brushes hanging, dangling, canvas everywhere
a place where legs are happily dancing, painting the skies

a place where there are trees around
With a soft pillow ground made of cold grass lawn

a place where theres peace but not loneliness,
a good kind of silence in sight,

a place below the shiny night sky
a place where heads can lay and count the stars up high

and perhaps with a shoulder whose answers never fails to surpise,
of where the city of tiny apples be? where rainbows end? how we can be?